“Assessing yourself as an individual and keeping a mental note about what parts of yourself you would like to maintain or improve.”
Self-evaluation. This word/phrase has become very popular within the last few months, especially since we have all had some time to rethink our lives during the lockdown period. And as young women figuring out our place within the world and with our efforts to establish the best version of ourselves, self-evaluation is part of that process.
However, without even having to explain, self-evaluation can often become toxic. From criticizing our personalities, habits and even our appearance, self-evaluation can often feel damaging. But it doesn’t have to be that way and it can be done in a non-toxic healthy way.
The key to improvement is by taking each day as it comes because being on the journey of self-improvement can be likened to building a house brick by brick. Although it may take time, each brick is significant and in the end, it contributes to the stability and construction of the house. So with that in mind, instead of focusing on the fact that you aren’t where you want to be, let's focus on how you can get there.
And just to emphasise, you do not have to radically change overnight. You make small changes which will make all the difference as time goes on. Here are some examples:
Goal: To be more approachable and friendly
Action: Smiling at passers-by, peers, work colleagues etc, making eye contact with people, giving genuine compliments to people.
Goal: To be more disciplined
Action: Set reminders for tasks on your phone, make a checklist or ask a friend to hold you more accountable.
No matter what you want to work on, it is worth knowing that it is not impossible to achieve and at the very least, all it takes is dedication and baby steps.
Another thing to know is that you should change your mindset and believe that you are already that person you wish to become.This is known as the self-fulling prophecy in sociology. When you ‘label’ yourself and think about yourself in a certain way, subconsciously, you begin to accept it and embody those beliefs. That is why you must be careful because it works oppositely also.
Owning your good qualities is something you need to do often. You need to sit down and ask yourself;
What do I admire about myself?
What makes me an amazing individual?
Perhaps it could be the fact that you are generous, ambitious, or someone who is always able to make others feel good.Whatever it may be, it is important to acknowledge your incredibleness because it is often easy to overlook our qualities or we tend not to realise them until somebody else does.
Firstly, be kind to yourself because self-evaluation is not an opportunity to attack yourself. Secondly, see yourself as the person you would like to become. Thirdly, take small consistent steps towards your goal. And finally, make sure you regularly remind yourself of how far you have come and how special you are.
